The Big Zero

Paul Krugman called the decade past the Big Zero. Zero job creation. Zero economic gains. Zero gains for homeowners. Zero gain for stocks.

"It was a decade in which nothing good happened, and none of the optimistic things we were supposed to believe turned out to be true."

Zero. That's 2009 for me. It is perhaps the most uneventful eventful year. An oxymoron. Many things happened, but nothing really happened.

I started the year convinced that I was going away; to a fresh new beginning. But less than halfway into the year, I realised it was not meant to be. For so many reasons, I couldn't and didn't want to. And so I left and returned to where I'd started - HR. Full circle. Instead of being the good little grateful officer that I was supposed to be, I had to send in my application for another job (overseas again) and caused quite a little disturbance with the superiors; only to realise I had sent the application to the wrong email address... "It was God's way of telling me that it's not time yet," I told my boss. And so the days passed by peacefully again.

On the dating scene, I tried dating a few guys. Rather hi-po (for the uninitiated, it stands for high potential in public sector speak) ones, I had imagined. Guys that I thought were charming, funny and/or nice. And I actually kinda liked them. BUT. You all know my funny horror stories. I am a magnet for strange, sad guys... Twice, I tried to walk out of this current situation. I cried my heart out and actually felt my heart aching and was convinced I had to move on. Yet each time, I fall right back in and here I am, still in status quo.

But if I could do everything all over again, I would because each one teaches me a valuable lesson. The former painful stint made me cherish my job and realise what I am good at. The current situation is teaching me... whatever that I need to learn.

Of course, 2009 was not a complete zero lah. I completed my first mini-marathon (10K haha!), started learning guitar (I am so giving up soon...), committed myself to photography (new body + lessons next yr!), stayed committed to yoga, spent more time at home (housework on Saturday mornings, time with Ricky), went for 2 entirely spontaneous trips (Bangkok and London), found out that I could handle 75% alcohol, found out that I COULD NOT handle caipirinha (gives me a heart attack or allergic reaction), realised my true friends and that I am a terrible snorer (SHIT).

I guess 2009 was really a year of self-discovery. Realising just how much shit I could handle and/or internalise.

Cheers to that.

London, Winter 2009

London. heathrow. bicester village. shopping. paul smith. okonomiyaki. best coffee at vergnano. la cage aux folles. tower of london. snow. national gallery. child with a dove. national portrait gallery. soho. dim sum at yauatcha. gobbling. full english breakfast. st paul's cathedral. millennium bridge. gabriel's wharf. nutella and banana crepes. icing sugar. south bank. london eye. big ben. the ugliest palace in the world. harrods. sudoku. leaky nose. coffee discs. billy elliot. fortnum and mason. tea and more tea. a lunch time concert at st martin-in-the-fields. fish and chips. chez bruce. orgasmic appetisers. dashing back in the cold. dozing on the tube. bak kwa. bbc. four seasons. too fat and too yummy duck. delicious kopparberg. covent garden. chicago. indian food at punjab restaurant. bejeweled. marks & spencer crunchflakes. tube. conveyor belt sushi. paddington station. farewell.

Honeycomb & Vanilla

I used to avoid using flash for my pictures - thinking and assuming it's too harsh and ugly. But oh, I finally got down to using the external flash that WL had kindly passed to me long ago and I LOVE IT LAH!! The external flash gives me gorgeous bright white pictures. I LUB!

Colours!

Cookyn with Mervyn

My colleague PW and I were invited by our colleague CW to attend a "cooking party" featuring a 4-course Italian meal with wine (!!!). Now, I'm not a "cooking person" (am an "eating person" haha) but after checking out the website of Cookyn With Mervyn and seeing how many past participants had their DSLR slung around their neck as they cooked, I was intrigued. Excellent photog opportunity! :)

The session was held at 270 Thomson Road, Novena Gardens (at the office space above the restaurant - Peach Garden).

Meet Mervyn - "The Food Explorer"

Meet Amanda - "Hostess Extraordinaire"

They are a perfect example of an extraordinary husband & wife team :)

And us - "The Chef Wannabes"

Mervyn's cooking philosophy is to use the best ingredients possible in terms of freshness and quality.

Large portabello mushroom and freshly grated parmesan for the Mushroom and Truffle Risotto.

Tip: Mervyn advised to not wash mushrooms but to instead wipe clean with kitchen paper towel. As mushrooms will absorb water, the taste will be different when you cook them (I think!)

Live littleneck clams from New Zealand for the Vongole.

According to Amanda, this was chosen as the flesh to shell ratio is good.

Freshly diced strawberries for the Strawberry Panna Cotta.

Handmade "meatballs on steroid" for the Italian Meatball Casserole with Fresh Mozzarella. They were the size of tennis balls!

Freshly chopped garlic

(I only put this here because PW and I were in charge of the garlic haha!)

This was the recommended brand for tomato puree. Not too sweet.

A device to ground pepper. Fully motorised with light. Cool stuff.

Herbs and wine. We had wine from start till end. Seriously.

As there was only one main working station, we had to gather round and take turns to handle different tasks such as chopping of herbs, stirring of risotto, frying of foods, handling the clams etc. This arrangement suited me fine as it allowed me to take pictures without worrying that I'm lagging or that my food is burning!

Not everyone gets to play with the cool device hor!

And the end results!

Vongole - The soup was flavourful and the clams sweet. Yummy.

Risotto - This was very fragrant (with truffle puree and porcini) and tasty. Though the rice tasted 3/4 cooked and I would have preferred it to be softer.

Panna Cotta - The panna cotta was premade as it required 3-4 hours to set. The largely milky sweet base topped with sugared pureed fresh strawberries and drizzled with Balsamic sauce (awesome stuff), this dessert was a sweet & sour comfort food.

Meatball casserole - I didn't try this as it was beef meatballs. :( But according to the rest, it was yummy!

The session was around 4 hours and very well-paced. Much of the usual stress of cooking was taken away as it was more of a cooking observation and handling relatively simple tasks. What I found useful were the tips that Mervyn would dish out along the way. Of course, the 4 bottles of wine that came as part of the session helped. :) For a group of 12 and above, the usual fee is around s$80 per pax. For a session of this length with good food, good company and good hosting, I would say it is worth an experience. Try it!

Cookyn With Mervyn

I think the only reason...

...why I keep going back to PS Cafe despite the overpriced mediocre food and beverages...

...is because I love the fresh flowers and gigantic floral arrangements; the brown and white sugar cubes;

...the general look and feel of the place;

...and the opportunity to take pictures in a pretty, pretty place.

Don't Waste the Pretty.

Don't waste the pretty. Don't waste the pretty.

Today was a beautiful day...

... because my good friend got married. And another good friend told me she's pregnant (for the fourth time!) and I'm super happy to be the sponsor of Baby Gap for the dear, cute little boy that he is bound to be. And all the love from my friends - the SMSes, calls and the offer of a drinks session.

Thank you. =)

I lost some, but I gained plenty

Coming back was the best decision I've made in a long time.

If only I can be as decisive and determined about other aspects of my life.

Have you ever...

...felt that your iPod mysteriously grows to understand your mood and plays songs to comfort you?

Today I was feeling grumpy about work after a long weekend and just before I went into office, my iPod (on Shuffle mode) played the chirpy, bubbly "Rivers of Love". After I knocked off from a long day, it played "What a Difference A Day Made" followed by another jazzy number. The real deal came when my iPod played a song I'd almost forgotten - "I Wish You Love" by Ann Sally and sent by elebeng sometime back with the email subject as "I'm positive... (that you will like this :))"

I wish you bluebirds in the spring

To give your heart a song to sing

And then a kiss, but more than this

I wish you love

And in July a lemonade

To cool you in some leafy glade

I wish you health

But more than wealth

I wish you love

Pet Peeves

1. Singaporeans with an American accent.... after a grand total of like, 6 months in the States. WOW. That must have been a life-changing experience for you! You must have been stoned for your kampung Singaporean accent.

2. People who smoke whilst walking and thus slowly killing the innocent people behind with their waste product.

3. People, especially men, who show no form of gratitude when you hold the lift doors open for them and walk out as though it's their God intended right to be an "I'm-so-important-with-my-business-talk-and-cellphone-and-blackberry-and-my-nose-is-in-the-air-and-you're-just-a-slave" a*hole with no manners.

4. Christian evangelism. You know, I do get it. You love your God and you think it's your duty to spread the joy otherwise the rest of us are just lost sheep with no meaning and purpose in life. It's just like how I would nag friends to eat their vegetables because it's good for them otherwise they can't poop smoothly and might fart and belch like mad from constipation. But really, you got to learn that not everybody minds being a "lost sheep" or not being able to have conversations with God or to not attain eternal salvation. Plus, I do go to the temple and I have conversations with Goddess of Mercy. I know you have kind intentions and have a "KPI" to fulfil but let us find our own way, please.

5. Blasting music on the handphone on public transport. Get headphones, you irritants. I don't want to listen to your crappy low-quality music.

6. People who try to squeeze me out of my seat on the train. Get your child to sit on your lap and not squeeze into my side of the seat and jabbing me with your fat arm and your kid's smelly butt.

7. Drivers who don't signal when making a turn. HELLO?! I'm not a driver but I know you need to signal.

8. PeOpLe WhO tYpE LiKe ThIs.

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle, when 24 Hours in a day is not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly,
he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls..

He then asked the students, if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf ball. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.. 'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things - family, children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions - Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else --The small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. 'Take care of the golf balls first -- The things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked'.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Can somebody tell me...

why my life is filled with SO MANY weird men?

Before I Turn 30

I want to:

1) Get a freaking driving license! -_-

2) Go to Santoriniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii


3) Camp under the stars in the Egypt desert (and see the pyramids lah)

4) Grow longer fingers so that I can play the guitar with style (haha one can only dream)

5) Finally commit myself to a charity or community service

6) Find a rich husband, quit my job and study full-time (ha ha ha)

Goodbye To An Era

It's been such fun with this bunch of people, I almost don't feel like leaving. Our yakun sessions & bitching sessions & story-telling sessions will be sorely missed. *sniff*

Love for Coffee

Somestimes life is about...

...stumbling upon something beautiful in the least expected place...

Love For Cats

My day instantly becomes better when I see this pair of cats in the neighbourhood. Firm friends, they cuddle each other to sleep, laze together in the sun and seek sayang together. The white one is clearly the older cat and I wonder what it takes for cats to be friends? :)

I love taking pictures of cats. Maybe it's because they are almost inanimate (haha), always lazing or sleeping.

But really, I love cats because they are so manja and easy to read. Purring means it's pleased; swaying of tail means it's irritated or angry; an arched back means it's afraid or being defensive; and a roll-over means an invitation to play or sayang. If only human beings are so easy and simple to interpret...

Love For a Child

My friend, Mien, takes awesome pictures and it's a joy for me to put them together in a photo journal for her. Finding captions, thematisation, selecting pictres... :) I have found another activity that I heart big time! <3